Friday, December 24, 2010

You Know You've Lived in Botswana 4 Months when...

1. It makes your day when you get the front seat on the combi

2. Ants consistently climb out of your bathtub

3. You've eaten more pap than your body weight

4. You've been asked to be married by random Batswana men on the street, sometimes more than once a day

5. You've had your phone and your wallet stolen on separate occasions at the Bus Rank without knowing it

6. You've gotten used to waiting 30-45 minutes for a cab

7. Your feet will forever be covered in dirt

8. You have "Wavin Flag," "Waka Waka Africa," and "Your Love" engrained in your head for the rest of eternity

9. You've spent more time on the internet in Linga Longa than on school work

10. You've seen more boobs around the house or in combis than you've ever seen in your life

11. You've gotten sick from vendor food at least once

12. You've succumbed to eating dirt fruit off the street

13. A 30 pula ($4.50) cab rid is a rip of and you would rather take a 3 pula combi, even if it means taking an hour longer

14. You find "tumble weaves," huge chunks of fake hair, lying on the street

15. You put Tomato Sauce on everything- eggs, veggies, pap, bread, etc.

16. You ned a dictionary to decipher a local Motswana's txt bc its so cnfsing

17. "Is it?" and "Serious?" have become parts of your everyday vocabulary

18. Savannah Dry is your new favorite alcoholic beverage

19. You pass a tuck shop on every corner

20. You've bought those 50 thebe sweets even though none of them taste good

21. You've perfected the art of denying men in Botswana

22. You "write" exams, even if they are multiple choice

23. It is no big deal when the combi nearly hits a little kid

24. People say "sori" for everything from hitting you in the face you dropping your phone

25. You've given up on hoping for toilet paper in public or private bathrooms

26. All your favorite food options at restaurants are consistently finished

27. You started off speeding past every pedestrian and now you find yourself walking just as slow as the locals!

28. You seat constantly wearing T-shirts and shorts though everyone around you is wearing turtlenecks, down jackets, and pants in 35 deg C heat

29. You forget what is weird here and accept cultural traditions as the norm

30. Your still scared about contracting TB on the combi

1 comment:

  1. I am from Botswana living in France at the moment. I was missing home and decided to Google stuff about my beloved country, and this is how I came across your blog. While I find some of the points above funny, I think some of them are a bit much, and tad bit offensive.

    I lived there most of my life and no, I've never had ants climbing out my bathtub, nor have my feet ever been covered in dirt, unless I was walking barefoot in the streets. Eating dirt fruit of the street? Nope, never done that either. never had my phone or my wallet stolen because I pay attention to what and who is around me (you have never been to Johannesburg, have you?). Never contracted TB either.

    Like I said, I laughed at some of your points, but the other stuff is silly. Don't be a typical Westener and make every African country sound like some uncivilised place. I mean, you in a house in Phakalane shows that it's a normal, liveable place.

    Other than that, I think it's nice that you took the steps to experience the country.

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